A Lil Lonsome.

Hey guys. Sorry it has been a bit since I posted last. Thank you again for the comments and seriously, I love reading them. It lets me hear your voice. Mom and Dad, I love you and miss ya, Ian, that was a good comment, Alex, I love and miss you too...I don't care if you are tired of hearin' it. I am lucky to have friends and family like you guys.

Well, I will fill you in on the past couple of days. We got back from Brockton at 6:00am last Tuesday morning. It was an off day...thank baby Jesus. So I just dragged back to the house and passed out. On off days, normally the guys either go play a round of golf, sleep, or go visit family. I happen to have a horrible slice, I can sleep when I die, and I do not have family close for hundreds of miles. So I played guitar and went on another hike. Kinda reminds of how I would spend my free time in France. When I started on my hike, I saw on the map that there was a lake about 6k away. I didn't have anything better to do, so I set out. I like having this time to myself to get air and not be around anyone but what enters my head mostly is you guys.




I miss the hell outa ya. I miss the beating sun in July, fire flies, Dad's french fries, and my girl.

I have just hit a wall really. The same wall that I would hit every now and then when I was in France. I know that I am privileged to come to a ballpark everyday and get paid to play a game. With that being said, at this point, I am just homesick. I hate to sound so glum because it is not my personality. I am not me if I am not smiling 80% of the day. The other 20% is laughing. I am learning that I have to face things in my life alone sometimes. And it is tough. I thank you for the support and love that you have shown.

I will share something with you a lil brighter though. We are playing the Sussex Skyhawks right now in a four game set. In yesterday's game, I started right field. Before the national anthem is performed, there is always a different little league team that goes out with the starters to their position. Funny thing is, this is one of my favorite parts of the day. I am not liein', I love this. These kids are so little and they look at me like I am Alex Rodriguez. So I always love to talk in French with the kid who runs out with me. The kid I had reminded me of lil Joey. Didn't look anything like him, but my heart felt a little tighter. So as my name was blared through the sound system, I took off to my position with this kid running as fast as he could to try and keep up. I backpedaled and laughed as he was sprinting with all of his might. Here is the translated conversation that I had with Laurent.

"Hey lil guy, you alright?" With a grin.
"Oh yeah! You are very fast!"
"What is your name?" I asked
"Laurent." He replied
"What position do you play?" I then asked.
"Oh, LF, RF, SS, P, 2B...." The list went on.
I smiled and then asked,
"Are you a good hitter?"
"OH YEAH. I hit my first homerun the other day. Can you hit one for me today?"
"Listen Laurent, that is a pretty tall order but I will try my best."
"Ok, can you sign my jersey after the game?"
I knew that it would bring down the value of his Chico Bail Bonds get up but replied,
"Of course I can. Laurent, it was a pleasure to talk with you."

I then turned him the right direction to look at the flag. The anthem started and there we were. Two kids standing side-by-side.

It is not the HR's, doubles, or plays that I make that really stick out to me since I have been playing outside of college. It is memories like these that really makes baseball fun.

I didn't hit a homerun for Laurent needless to say, but I did get him a bases clearing double. The past three starts that Gagne has had, I have just been on fire. I have found out sometimes that I really do well when certain people pitch on the same team as me. Another pitcher that comes to mind is Lendsey Thompson. I always raked when he threw when we played together in Nevada.

Josh and I have attended weekly bible sessions with the team preacher. It is open to the whole team but Josh and I are usually the only ones in attendance. His name is John and he is just a great guy. Reminds me of Chris a lil bit. We get to the ballpark early and have lunch together. We go over scripture and just talk about what is going on in our lives. It is just a good escape from the routine.

Well tonight I didn't do so well. I went 0-4 and had a dogshit approach at the plate. I brought my lonesomeness to the park. Can't do that. But it happens and I am alive. That's the good thing.

Te quiero y te amo muy mucho. No puedo esperar a verte'.